What is domestic violence?
Domestic violence is a pattern of abusive behaviors used by one individual intended to exert power and control over another individual in the context of an intimate or family relationship. Domestic violence takes many forms: physical, sexual, emotional/verbal, and/or destruction of property and pets.
How do I know if my relationship is healthy?
Does your partner:
- Embarrass you with bad names and put downs?
- Look at you or act in ways that scare you?
- Control what you do, who you see or talk to, or where you go?
- Stop you from seeing or talking to friends and/or family?
- Take your money, make you ask for money, or refuse to give you money?
- Make all the decisions?
- Tell you that you are a bad person or threaten to take away or hurt your children?
- Act like the abuse is no big deal, it's your fault, or even deny doing it?
- Destroy your property or threaten to hurt your pets?
- Intimidate you with guns, knives, or other weapons?
- Shove, hit, kick, bite, or pinch you?
- Refuse to respect your privacy?
- Force you to do sexual things against your will?
- Threaten to kill you?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be in an unhealthy relationship.
If I am in an unhealthy relationship, how can I keep myself safe?
- Stay calm
- Have a safety plan (what to do if you are in danger)
- Develop signs with neighbors so that they know if you need them to call 911
- Make a list of safe places and people
- Make copies of car keys, house keys, and important documents and store them somewhere safe where you can get them if you need to.
- Stay out of the bathroom and kitchen, if possible, during a violent incidence
- Talk to your kids about what they can do to be safe
- Pack a small bag with clothes for you and your children. Keep this somewhere safe so that you can get to it in a hurry.
To find out more information and to talk to someone who understands, please call Harmony Place at (540) 635-9062 or the Virginia Family Violence and Sexual Assault Hotline at 800-838-8238. Harmony Place can assist you with emergency shelter, individual and/or group supportive counseling, court/legal advocacy, safety planning, transportation to safety, and community referrals.
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